butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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