I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
ok first of all what the fuck
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
