Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
