Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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