well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Can you bring me the toilet please
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
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