we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
