please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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