Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
