he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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