You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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