no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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