i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize