I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
im six kinds of drunk right now
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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