Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
