Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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