we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
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