we have officially mastered the walk of shame
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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