singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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