don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize