Tell her she can't have a vagina
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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