He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
