Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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