so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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