i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
