It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
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