Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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