Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Randomize
