Duck Duck Cougar?
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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