we have officially lost it.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
