Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
