There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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