Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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