He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
