I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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