Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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