I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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