I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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