I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
pop tarts are not kleenex
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
