And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
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I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
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Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
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