I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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