A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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