The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
