Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
