I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
