she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
