were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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