I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize
