Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
