May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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