I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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