I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
How external is "for external use only"?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
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